


En garde....Fence!!!

by anonymousAlchemist



Category: Homestuck, MS Paint Adventures
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Fencing, Gen, Humanstuck, derps being derps, obscure sports that almost noone knows how to play, sports!!!!, swords and highschoolers, what more do you want
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-02-08
Updated: 2013-02-08
Packaged: 2017-11-28 15:58:12
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 390
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/676226
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/anonymousAlchemist/pseuds/anonymousAlchemist
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Fencing is a sport about precision, elegance, and outwitting your opponent.<br/>It is also the sport descended from bloodthirsty fights to the death. </p>
<p> </p>
<p>(Or, the high school au where everyone fences and teenage shenanigans go down.)</p>
            </blockquote>





	En garde....Fence!!!

****

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**CAPTAINS: SEND EMAIL**

* * *

  
To: [amegido@skaia.org](mailto:amegido@skaia.org), [scaptor@skaia.org](mailto:scaptor@skaia.org), [nlejion@skaia.org](mailto:nlejion@skaia.org), [kmaryam@skaia.org](mailto:kmaryam@skaia.org), [tpyrope@skaia.org](mailto:tpyrope@skaia.org), [vserket@skaia.org](mailto:vserket@skaia.org), [ezahhak@skaia.org](mailto:ezahhak@skaia.org), [eampora@skaia.org](mailto:eampora@skaia.org), [fpeixes@skaia.org](mailto:fpeixes@skaia.org), [dstrider@skaia.org](mailto:dstrider@skaia.org), [rlalonde@skaia.org](mailto:rlalonde@skaia.org), [jharley@skaia.org](mailto:jharley@skaia.org),  
Cc: [jegbert@skaia.org](mailto:jegbert@skaia.org), [sslick@skaia.](mailto:sslick@skaia.org)[org](mailto:sslick@skaia.org),  
  
Subject: OBLIGATORY SEASON OPENING EMAIL  
  
HEY ASSHOLES THIS IS YOUR CAPTAIN SPEAKING.  
SINCE YOU BULGEMUNCHES HAD THE LACK OF GOOD SENSE TO ELECT MY HIDEOUS FESTERING FACE AS CAPTAIN LAST YEAR APPARENTLY I’M OBLIGED TO SEND EMAILS ABOUT THE SEASON STARTING AND LINEUPS AND ALL THAT OTHER STUPID BUGFUCKERY THAT AFTER THIS I’M DELEGATING TO CAPTOR AND EGBERT.  
  
LOOK, THE SEASON STARTS IN A WEEK. GET READY FOR SORE THIGHS AND WEIRD KNEE PROBLEMS BECAUSE WE ARE GOING TO WIN STATES THIS YEAR IF I HAVE TO DRAG YOU THERE KICKING AND SCREAMING LIKE THE WHINY BABIES YOU ARE. PRACTICE GOES FROM MONDAY TO FRIDAY IN THE WEST GYM, 3 TO 5 EXCEPT WHEN WE HAVE MEETS ETC ETC.  
  
YOU KNOW I ACTUALLY HAVE NO IDEA WHY I’M SENDING THIS YOU GUYS ALREADY KNOW ALL THIS BULLSHIT, IT’S NOT LIKE ANYONE NEW IS JOINING THE TEAM THIS YEAR BECAUSE NOBODY EVEN KNOWS WHAT FENCING IS.  
  
OH YEAH, AND GET YOUR ATHLETIC FORMS IN BEFORE THIS FRIDAY, THEY’RE IN AN ATTACHED FORM.  
  
I THINK THAT’S ABOUT IT. SEE YOU NOOKSTAINS ON MONDAY.  
  
KARKAT VANTAS

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To: [amegido@skaia.org](mailto:amegido@skaia.org), [scaptor@skaia.org](mailto:scaptor@skaia.org), [nlejion@skaia.org](mailto:nlejion@skaia.org), [kmaryam@skaia.org](mailto:kmaryam@skaia.org), [tpyrope@skaia.org](mailto:tpyrope@skaia.org), [vserket@skaia.org](mailto:vserket@skaia.org), [ezahhak@skaia.org](mailto:ezahhak@skaia.org), [eampora@skaia.org](mailto:eampora@skaia.org), [fpeixes@skaia.org](mailto:fpeixes@skaia.org), [dstrider@skaia.org](mailto:dstrider@skaia.org), [rlalonde@skaia.org](mailto:rlalonde@skaia.org), [jharley@skaia.org](mailto:jharley@skaia.org),  
Cc:  [sslick@skaia.org](mailto:sslick@skaia.org), [kvantas@skaia.org](mailto:kvantas@skaia.org),  
  
Subject: Fwd: OBLIGATORY SEASON OPENING EMAIL  
  
  
hey guys!  
  
karkat sent the opening email without me (not cool man, not cool), and he forgot to mention a couple things:  
if anyone needs their medical forms updated, then get those in too! we don’t want anyone benched because they forgot them, that would be stupid.  
also, a (very preliminary) meet and tournament schedule is up on the school website, so download that and mark your calendars! we’ve got a pretty small team this year, so we need everyone there at every meet.  
lastly, we are going to kick ass this year. trust me!  
  
anyway, that’s about it. if you’ve got any questions, email me or karkat.  
  
thanks!  
john

**Author's Note:**

> for real-time updates, extra illustrations, and other character notes go to www.fencingstuck.tumblr.com  
> thanks for reading~


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